Then, in contrast, I think, bollocks to it, I don't care what anyone else thinks of me. What you think of me. What they think of me. What he thinks of me.
I do care what the Bean thinks of me.
Even though I've done rebellious quite a lot over the years, I really do, and have always, cared what my family thinks of me.
I have so much self imposed guilt that I think I might implode.
And then other days, like today, when the sun is OUT and I am in it, I think, what in the universe is there to worry about. Worry, stress, regret, guilt, anxiety; are all an enormous waste of energy and life and precious moments in which we could all just live and be and enjoy and see and love and live, live, live!
We've just been to Confest. Can you tell?
Yesterday we saw my grandparents for just a quick drop in. My Ray, (my grandfather who, when I was little couldn't decide what he wanted me to call him, he didn't like grandpa or pop or pa or anything like that, and by stalling so long, I just called him his name) and The Bean and I sat in the backyard for a quick chat. He's nearly 85. The Bean is 6.
Ray and the Bean, 4 generation apart, in one photo.
How awesome is that?!?
Things The Bean has said:
1.
TB: If I was real electric, I'd be a star and I'd have lots of stars behind me that spelled my name. And Finlay would ask his mama if I was coming over to visit and she would say yes, soon, but he's in a star.
2. Spelling 1.
After almost every sentence, the Bean is now asking me to spell every word. Although I'm super stoked with his enthusiasm. It does get tricky when trying to have a conversation.
TB: I like spelling
3.
TB: Look at my mouth, Mama. Can you see it pumping up? (huh huh hah) I'm using all of my air but I still can't fly.
4.
TB: I need a drink when I eat, so it pushes the food down. It's like a comet. Not a sea comet, but it goes down my throat and grabs the zucchini slice and flushes it down. The water is faster than the zucchini slice.
5.
TB: I'm magic, Mama, I can do all tricky things that you can't do.
Me: Cool, like what?
TB: Like handstands.
6.
TB: How do ants dig into the concrete?
Me: There might be a tiny little crack in there so they can get underneath.
TB: And the ants have to go down and feed the babies where there's no light down there. Because the babies don't want to come up into the world where they think that people are monsters.
7. Stops his scooter to pick up a long needle thing from Norfolk Island Pine.
Me: Are you going to put that on your nature bedside table?
TB: Yeh, because I love nature.
Me: That's so cool, I love that you love nature.
TB: Yeh, I wish my scooter could fly.
8. Spelling 2
TB: If, if, of, if, if, of.
T, h, t, h, the, that, th
Good morning TH
9. Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde 1
TB: My brain said, 'Have you got your drink bottle?' And I said 'Yes, I think so'. But when I got home my brain was right, I left it at school.
10.
TB: You're symmetrical, Mama.\
11. Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde 2
Me: Can you please go back outside and play, it's beautiful out there.
TB: My brain thought it was time to go inside.
12. My friend and I deciding what to drink.
Me (to her): Yeh just Merlot.
TB: I like milo..... I want a milkshake.
13.
Me: Are you super hungry?
TB: I could eat the whole world... With butter on it.
14. Joe Cocker?
Me: Come here, I'll help you do your belt up... Your fly is undone. You don't want your dangle to be hanging out. Unless you're at confest. Hehehe.
TB: At Confest you can have everything hanging out. You can take all your clothes off and be nude at Confest...Except your hat. You can leave your hat on.
15.
TB: Everytime I spend my money, Mama, I'll buy books. I promise. If the man at the shop wants me to buy something plastic I'll just say 'No, please, I'm buying books.'
16.
TB: I think this river is nature.
17.
TB: What does friendship mean, Mama?
Me: What do you think it means?
TB: I think it means when kids fall in love.
